Monday, September 03, 2007

Triple whammy

As previously posted, Friday and Saturday night were bad, but last night was much worse in many ways. Lucy seems to have started using Mummy as a dummy! (That's a pacifier in the US I believe.)

Late last night she woke when we tried to change her around 10.45pm and then had to be fed. By the end of the feed she was out for the count.

She then woke when we tried to put her in the crib but was pacified by another feed. Then she woke again as we tried to put her in the crib for the second time. We soon realised what was happening: she would only go to sleep on the breast. Eventually we tried to comfort her in her crib but she cried a lot, eventually falling asleep around 1.15am. She was shattered but really didn't want to go to sleep in any way excepting via feeding.

This is a bad blow. So after three sleep deprived nights Hayley rang the Health Visitor today for some support. Now, without going into detail about the problems we've had in the past breastfeeding Oliver, they know we are pretty much on our own and Hayley told the person she spoke to that she'd had next to no sleep over the weekend. And yet the Health Visitor didn't even return her call, not even for 30 seconds to say "I got your message, I've not forgotten you". I am disgusted at this. For all she knows Hayley was at her wits end and the baby was abandoned or harmed.

OK, as they already know how we were with Oliver, they know that's not really likely, but I still don't think it excuses their total lack of response.

Tonight Lucy has been sleepy but would only stop crying and go to sleep we picked her up. Not a good sign. I know young babies need cuddles and re-assurance, but the cycle of feeding coupled with her refusing to sleep unaided is very exhausting. Especially for Hayley.

At the heart of all this is our uncertainty over how to handle this issue of Lucy using Hayley as a dummy. There are other aspects too which we'd like to talk through. It's depressing and infuriating not to be able to do so when we feel so tired and frustrated. So this evening Hayley got out a dummy (though we haven't yet used it) and we're also about ready to start moving to bottle feeding too. It's a shame as we can see all the benefits of breastfeeding. But we have our own version of the "Breast is Best" slogan. "Breast is best, but only if Mum isn't stressed". Maybe it will all turn round again, but without the necessary support we aren't going to put the whole family through unnecessary stress just to keep the breastfeeding going.

Post Script. Now trying to go to bed and she is doing exactly the same as last night. Great... The only glimmer of hope is that last night she slept for 6 hours once asleep, despite waking onc around 3.30am but falling back asleep by the time we were up to feed her and had carried her into the feeding room.